i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
