You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Randomize
