2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
