What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Dick very happy bro
Randomize
