i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
