We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Randomize
