the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
