can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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