How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
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