Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
