Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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