What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
