yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize