What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I am in a vortex of obligation.
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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