His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
