How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
then he tried to convert me to islam
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
