when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
