Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Randomize
