i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
