oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize
