Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize