i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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