I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Randomize
