it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
