I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
People in love make me want to vomit
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Randomize
