who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
it hurts more in the daytime
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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