I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
