Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
it's like heaven, but drunker
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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