Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
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