Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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