I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
