Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize