dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
