so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
