so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
