is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
