i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
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