I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
