remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
