Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
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