Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
