i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
