I cockslap morals
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
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