well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
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Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
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I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.