this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize