and my herpes radar will keep us safe
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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