yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
