i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
