So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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