Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize