its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Come on in and take your pants off
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