Its about making memories worth repressing
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize