but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
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